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No. 2052

Grandad Tells Another. By CpSingleton © 2016

Another favourite story from the floppy lips of Grandad Huntstable

Was the tale of the Shabberong.

One Christmas he sat me on his swaying knees, his gentle Newcastle Brown aftershave filling my nostrils until gagging point, and whispered the following loudly:

“Shabberong arghed and he then whistled! Hahaha!! He tanned it weekends and yer mum dont know nothing! Haha! You get me though, don’t ya kiddo?! I know ya do! Hey! Where’s my pipe?! Yer granda’ loves ya, ya know tha’ right?! Haha DINNER TIME!! The end! Ya granda’s a good story tellerer in’t he lad?”

He then stopped and whispered quietly.

“I’m not drunk really; not in the way your gran seems to think. I want you to listen, my lad, do you understand?”

I nodded silently, utterly confused.

“Don’t expect much out of this life and you won’t be shocked and let idiots think what they want. They will anyway. You understand?”

I nodded once again; even more confused.

“And lastly: don’t be a sheep, son, not even in the Christmas nativity. Be yourself, no matter whatever comes out and…”

He then stopped at the sudden appearance of my mother.

“…never trust any man called Jennifer!” He bellowed, back in usual drunken skin once again.

He was right, my Grandad Huntstable. 

Men by the name of Jennifer are untrustworthy.


About Chris42

I am a liar! A maker-uper of stories! If this was the 16 (c) I'd be burned as a witch. Fank goodness it is not, eh?! I have four children: two wonderful girls, a fantastic lad and Leeds United. I have no strict genre. I write children's poetry and stories, to edgy, stronger themes. Up until now I have stored them for my own and my family's viewing. Last year i thought bugger it and starred in several short films. One, Playground, which is on the BBC Film Network, used the monologue that I wrote for the audition. You should've seen the face of the receptionist, of the Manchester hotel, where the audition was being held, as I turned up dressed as the psychopath, Gordon. It got the desired effect! I then moved up to Cumbria and wrote and appeared in several live performances on stage. 2012. A local artist, Kayleigh Richardson, commissioned me to write a poem for her to paint a representation. I sent her, The Rise of the Robot Monkey Army. Kayleigh painted a fantastic piece that blew my mind! From that we are collaborating on the Jacob Bear series of stories. Oh and Two's Company is to published, along with seventeen other Sci Fi short stories as part of a collection. Not a bad start to the, so called, last year of the Earth. Now is the time to show the rest of you. I take my themes wherever i see them, whether in reality or dream-world. I hope you enjoy. If not tell me why. If so tell me why. Many thanks and be safe. So far I have published: Jacob Bear's first Christmas,https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007GK872A (UK) http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007GK872A (USA) Jacob Bear Goes to School https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007JD3OKY (UK) http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007JD3OKY (USA Jacob's First Words https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007VZWPSC (UK) & http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007VZWPSC (USA) Space Here https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007H96M90 (UK) &http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007H96M90#reader_B007H96M90 The Rise of the Sponge Cake Moon https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007WWZ16M (UK) & http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007WWZ16M (USA) © Madstoffa, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.


3 thoughts on “No. 2052

  1. I love Grandad.

    Posted by Justice&Humanity | January 5, 2016, 4:54 pm

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© C.p.Singleton, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Don't make me have to take the shirt off your whipped back if you break the rules! I will you know! Us writing folk work hard to make rubbish up for you to enjoy, so don't abuse or you lose! Tha's right!

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