The Plight of Johan Sebastian. By CpSingleton © 2014
Johan Sebastien Crabstick
Was named after a famous sea snack.
Is father had a ridiculous sense of humour,
Is mother was related to Bach.
This proved a tiresome pain for young Johan
Having to tell and retell the silly tale.
He told it to friends and workmates
Up mountains and down damp dale.
Then when he reached twenty-one
He decided to change his own name.
But, what sounded less conspicuous?
What address would offer less fame?
He looked through the phone books of England
There was bound to be boring names there.
The Browns and the Smiths and the Jones’
Had a common theme that they shared.
Could he make himself super-delux boring
If he combined the three to make one?
But Smithbrownjones was plain stupid and
Not in the tiniest bit fun.
So he “hip-dipped…” until he landed on Brown.
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