It is a well-known scientific fact that supermarkets work on a different set of programme rules compared with most other buildings in the universe. For instance, if a being trapped inside is in a rush to get out the core programme works its hardest to prevent them from leaving. If a customer in a rush can get through the checkouts without standing behind a dithering buffoon who wants to pay for a big shop with a sack full pennies, or the server can’t work the card machine, then they are bound to be obstructed by a slow moving wave of prams or walking frames in a race to see who can get to the exit in the longest possible time.
The latter is where an infuriated Karl and Jess found themselves as they attempted to find their Doppelgängers.
Left and right they desperately attempted to weave: to no avail.
Karl, who normally had the patience of a woodwork teacher a year from retirement, could feel his blood filling up behind his tympanic membranes.
At the point where he envisaged himself lifting a dear, tottering old gentleman and throwing him unceremoniously into the tobacco kiosk he spotted an opening. He swapped the bag he was carrying in his left hand into the right and grabbed for Jess’ free hand.
In one swift movement that brought relief to his ears they were through and out into a mid-morning shower of rain.
Through the stinking cloud of smokers they swept.
‘That’s our car!’ He shrieked, when he could see agan, pointing to a red convertible mini that was leaving the car park and heading for the petrol station. ‘They’re nicking Vossy!’
‘Karl, calm down,’ Jess hissed, feeling her face heating up at the amount of eyes on them, despite the cold Cumbrian rain that had begun to fall in buckets.
‘Calm down!? They’ve got Vossy!’
‘The car’s still where we bloody parked it,’ she again hissed, before pointing to the Mini across the wet car park.
Karl looked from the identical car leaving the car park to the one still parked, dumbfounded.
‘I swear blind that had the same number plate as ours.’
‘That’s not even possible, love. You’ve been drawn into this twin nonsense. Let’s just grab some petrol and get home. I’m bored with all this now.’
‘Well, you can stay here if you want, but I’m going. This has been a ridiculous morning filled with coincidences and idiots.’ She told him and headed towards Vossy.
‘You calling me an idiot?’ He asked, following.
‘If you carry on standing in the rain, gabbling about Doppelgängers, yes.’