Then it was, during a break in the rain clouds, as the sun bathed his skin through the charity shop window, that Colin came across a film called, Men Who Stare At Goats.
The DVD cover photo, with four giants of the silver screen and a nameless goat looking resolutely ahead, was enough to attract his attention. He bought it immediately for one whole, standard English pound and practically jogged home.
Later, as he watched it he was struck with what a funny, yet a sad tale it was. Colin adored the film immediately.
However it wasn’t until he checked out the Special Features that he found something which blew his little mind to smithereens!
He came across what was, to him, proof that psychics existed!
He watched a documentary telling him that American and Russian governments had been involved in actually training soldiers to walk through walls and find people in other countries with only the power of their minds!
With new vigour, and a belief that it was surely destiny who brought the DVD and himself together, Colin trained harder.
He researched exercises on the web. He practised meditation. He turned to vegetarianism.
He became obsessed.
He also broke his nose and battered his rubber lips so many times on the solid wall of his bedroom that his mother was convinced that he was being bullied.
The pain only served to push him further.
He watched the film every day. Sometimes even three times a day.
He was convinced that if Kevin (K-Pax) Spacey and Obi-wan Mcgregor were involved then there was no doubt it could work.
If only he could train his body and mind to accept that everything was made up of atoms and that in between those atoms must be space. A space that his body, also made up of atoms and space, should surely pass through if charged towards at a fast enough velocity.
The day eventually came when he was prepared to tell himself that he was ready.
That he was ready to be the first human to manipulate atoms.
That he, Colin Marion Worthington, was ready to pass right through the wall of his bedroom and then…who knows. The world would be his psychic playground. He would be a Jedi master. He would save trapped cats and foil bank robberies. He would get the girl and treat her to a Big Mac meal. He would be the one that the kids strived to be and not the one they sniggered at. In short: he would be the HERO!
He watched the film one last time, as a kind of reassurance for his excited mind.
He then relaxed his thoughts and controlled his pulse.
He flexed his body and stretched his muscles.
He moved to the far end of his tiny bedroom, breathed in deeply and then out several times.
He thanked the universe for the opportunity and then took the five swift strides across his busy floor.
Five strides that were most obviously not nearly enough to force himself through to the other side.
The initial burst of excitement he felt as his body broke the shell of physical law was soon replaced by absolute claustrophobic terror!
Luckily for this psychic guru he had a huge conk of a nose. If not, he would have found himself entombed in the dividing wall with no way to breath.