Only Happy When It’s Cold! By CpSingleton © 2016
Is there a chance that we may
Have a winter this year?
There’s a definite difference
To the sounds of Nelson.
The air isn’t filled with insects and
The ear wilting shrills of kids.
It’s got more of a hissing quality
That pushes through the smallest
Cracks in the windows and doors,
Like sinister ectoplasm, come to
Wrap its benevolence around any
Open skin and freeze it tight.
Even the cars shiver about the
Streets they usually glide along;
Speakers blasting out killer tunes,
But not today. Today they must
Get home quick to fling their
Blue bodies on to a radiator, or
Under a thick, inviting quilt.
Today is hot comfort food day.
It’s stews and soups; curries and
Homemade Spotted Dick,
Drenched in piping hot custard.
You can keep your trifle today.
Yet, despite the misery for some,
I love the cold! It somehow sends
The blood around my body with
A damned good smile in its cells.
I wonder sometimes if my
Ancestors weren’t seals.
It would make perfect sense, as
I have a strong aversion to being
Chomped on by a killer whale and
I do love a good Yo Sushi.
Or there again I could just have
Some Scandinavian blood in me.
So, in short -or in fact very long-
You can keep your summer sun;
Your heavy, stifling pullover of
Humidity that slows my wit and will,
I prefer to brrrr than pant any day.
You can always slip on another
Woolen layer if it’s too cold, but
Wander out, as bare as the day you
First fell blindly between your
Mother’s knees, and people frown,
Laugh or, like nervous nellies,
Call the Peelers in to arrest you.