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Spinster’s Logic. By CpSingleton © 2016

 

Edward Spinster woke up confused, before stretching with very little certainty in his spine.

The last memory he could dredge from his swampy mind was of being in bed. But here he was, bobbing slightly, in a soft, warm raft that filled his nostrils with the comforting aroma of grandma’s Sunday kitchen.

He shuffled to sit up and stopped with shock to see, all round him, as far as his narrowed eyes could see, bubbled a sea of deep brown. It shined on the surface like melted chocolate, but it wasn’t anything so sweet.

Without warning steel lightening appeared out of the sky, cutting the raft in half.

Now he knew what a Yorkshire Pudding felt.

After he awoke, screaming, he vowed to be a carnivore from that day forth, because he would rather eat than be eaten; without a doubt.

He also utilised the same bubble-wrapped logic to enter politics. Though he walked away three weeks later. Edward was a complex fucker like that. The cocaine and bleating did not mix well in his mind.

Some years later, during his last few, throaty breaths on this earth, he realised he’d got the message all wrong, but knew he could do bugger all about it. So, he sighed and closed his eyes for the last time with the aroma of Yorkshire Puddings fresh in his nostrils and an irrational anchoring for onion gravy.

 

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About Chris42

I am a liar! A maker-uper of stories! If this was the 16 (c) I'd be burned as a witch. Fank goodness it is not, eh?! I have four children: two wonderful girls, a fantastic lad and Leeds United. I have no strict genre. I write children's poetry and stories, to edgy, stronger themes. Up until now I have stored them for my own and my family's viewing. Last year i thought bugger it and starred in several short films. One, Playground, which is on the BBC Film Network, used the monologue that I wrote for the audition. You should've seen the face of the receptionist, of the Manchester hotel, where the audition was being held, as I turned up dressed as the psychopath, Gordon. It got the desired effect! I then moved up to Cumbria and wrote and appeared in several live performances on stage. 2012. A local artist, Kayleigh Richardson, commissioned me to write a poem for her to paint a representation. I sent her, The Rise of the Robot Monkey Army. Kayleigh painted a fantastic piece that blew my mind! From that we are collaborating on the Jacob Bear series of stories. Oh and Two's Company is to published, along with seventeen other Sci Fi short stories as part of a collection. Not a bad start to the, so called, last year of the Earth. Now is the time to show the rest of you. I take my themes wherever i see them, whether in reality or dream-world. I hope you enjoy. If not tell me why. If so tell me why. Many thanks and be safe. So far I have published: Jacob Bear's first Christmas,https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007GK872A (UK) http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007GK872A (USA) Jacob Bear Goes to School https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007JD3OKY (UK) http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007JD3OKY (USA Jacob's First Words https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007VZWPSC (UK) & http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007VZWPSC (USA) Space Here https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007H96M90 (UK) &http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007H96M90#reader_B007H96M90 The Rise of the Sponge Cake Moon https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007WWZ16M (UK) & http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007WWZ16M (USA) © Madstoffa, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.

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© C.p.Singleton, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Don't make me have to take the shirt off your whipped back if you break the rules! I will you know! Us writing folk work hard to make rubbish up for you to enjoy, so don't abuse or you lose! Tha's right!

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