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Today is Silly Sunday, so…
The Plight of the Pickled Egg.

Once upon a rotting bar sat a murky looking jar. Bobbing about inside discoloured vinegar half-filling the jar was a bored pickled egg.

The pickled egg believed there must be more to life, but had no hands, never mind opposable thumbs, to open the jar’s lid to escape.

It spent its days staring out of the dirty glass prison it found itself with emptiness in its little yellow soul.

Lifeforms strolled in and wobbled out. Rubber sandwiches and baskets of soggy chips passed from hand to mouth. And it witnessed bar fights and inept floppy flirting.

Though, it all seemed to happen around the pickled egg and not to the pickled egg. Which was a bit of bitch if you asked said pickled egg.

Until one day, Urv, the village drunk, gave the landlord a silver farthing to fish the pickled egg out of the jar.

The pickled egg squeaked and squealed with excitement as nicotine and filth stained fingers squeezed into the jar and fumbled for its smooth body.

For a full minute after retrieval, the swaying man stared with dancing eyes at the egg and the pickled egg looked around at its surroundings, with a sigh.

The crumpled and drenched napkin it sat on felt like a feather mattress would to a man who found his nights in shop doorways as a rule.

‘I’m free!’ The egg said, before being stuffed into the battered and stinky mouth of Urv.

There’s a moral to this story, but it involves a lot of LSD and a copy of Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas.

The End.

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About Chris42

I am a liar! A maker-uper of stories! If this was the 16 (c) I'd be burned as a witch. Fank goodness it is not, eh?! I have four children: two wonderful girls, a fantastic lad and Leeds United. I have no strict genre. I write children's poetry and stories, to edgy, stronger themes. Up until now I have stored them for my own and my family's viewing. Last year i thought bugger it and starred in several short films. One, Playground, which is on the BBC Film Network, used the monologue that I wrote for the audition. You should've seen the face of the receptionist, of the Manchester hotel, where the audition was being held, as I turned up dressed as the psychopath, Gordon. It got the desired effect! I then moved up to Cumbria and wrote and appeared in several live performances on stage. 2012. A local artist, Kayleigh Richardson, commissioned me to write a poem for her to paint a representation. I sent her, The Rise of the Robot Monkey Army. Kayleigh painted a fantastic piece that blew my mind! From that we are collaborating on the Jacob Bear series of stories. Oh and Two's Company is to published, along with seventeen other Sci Fi short stories as part of a collection. Not a bad start to the, so called, last year of the Earth. Now is the time to show the rest of you. I take my themes wherever i see them, whether in reality or dream-world. I hope you enjoy. If not tell me why. If so tell me why. Many thanks and be safe. So far I have published: Jacob Bear's first Christmas,https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007GK872A (UK) http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007GK872A (USA) Jacob Bear Goes to School https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007JD3OKY (UK) http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007JD3OKY (USA Jacob's First Words https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007VZWPSC (UK) & http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007VZWPSC (USA) Space Here https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007H96M90 (UK) &http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007H96M90#reader_B007H96M90 The Rise of the Sponge Cake Moon https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B007WWZ16M (UK) & http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007WWZ16M (USA) © Madstoffa, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.

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© C.p.Singleton, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Don't make me have to take the shirt off your whipped back if you break the rules! I will you know! Us writing folk work hard to make rubbish up for you to enjoy, so don't abuse or you lose! Tha's right!

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